Yucky Hily and Wacky Donny

Episode 5: Plastered In Paris, can be therapeutically calming.

Sitting in a seedy bar in downtown Paris, Hily was dressed in a college graduate robe and mortarboard (hat) smoking a cigarette and drinking vodka and tonic. Her mascara was thick and running slightly at the corner of her both eyes, with her blush over-applied, camouflaging here excessive pancake makeup that hid her wrinkles and most recently added worry lines  from the stress induced from shock therapy that accompanied her frequent visits to the mental hospital after the election. One cigarette after another she lit and choked down, following large gulps of vodka and tonic. A young man was sitting at the bar who was frequently looking at Hily between sips of his beer. Hily, although engulfed in her gulps of vodka and cigarettes, noticed the young man looking at her. “Why don’t you take a picture sweetie? It could last longer.” said Hily taking another drag from her smoke. “I do apologise, but you do resemble that woman that was on the TV frequently not so long ago. I was intrigued.” said the young Frenchman with an accent. “Well, don’t be shy, come over and sit with me and we can chat, honey.” said Hily as she pushed a chair out with her black high heeled boot, inviting the young Frenchman to her table. “Thank you madam.” said the young Frenchman as he grabbed his beer and walked to sit down beside Hily at her table. “Call me Hily, handsome!” said Hily in a sexy tone, sensuously taking another drag from her smoke.  The young Frenchman sat down and smiled, as he placed his beer on the table. “So what is your name baby?” asked Hily trying to appear sexy. “Call me Pierre, Hily. I am from this area and would love to show you around. You seem to be alone. Is that intentional?” asked Pierre eyeing Hily up and down. “I am a big girl Pierre, don’t worry about me. I am just taking a break from my life right now and need some action. Do you have any thing stronger then this turpentine I have been drinking?” said Hily as she finished the last gulp of her drink. “That could be arranged, but I would need something in exchange, like money or, well something in equivalence perhaps?” said Pierre coveting Hily’s older but enticing form. “Oh Pierre, what would I have to do? As if I did not know!” said Hily sarcastically. “Well, for one session with you, a man would pay, perhaps, 800 euros? I could get you at least 4 to five sessions each evening. The night is young. Perhaps 3 this evening?” said Pierre now rubbing Hily’s plump but curvy thigh. “Don’t I get a session with you first? You do not want to test the goods Pierre?” said Hily winking allowing Pierre’s advances and groping. “There will be plenty of time for that Hily. I will give some morphine when we get to the room I can arrange for you. You just have to wait there and I will bring the clients to you. Is it an arrangement?” said Pierre in his well rehearsed tone and manner. “Like I am the whore and you are the pimp, right?” said Hily being thoroughly street wise from Billy’s and Donny’s influences in her life. “I prefer to call myself a “procurer of fine women”. I only deal with classy femmes” said Pierre, now with his hand up Hily’s college robe, slithering around here inner thighs and vaginal area. “Ok, Pierre, I will do it, but I better see the smack first, or I walk. Got it?” said Hily with authority. “Good, good, Hily, I will show you to your room. You can order anything from there using the phone. ” said Pierre now standing up helping Hily from her seat. They both walked out of the small bar arm in arm, with Pierre’s hand on Hily’s buttocks.

Meanwhile, back in the United States, in the Whitehouse, Donny was sitting at the head of the strategic boardroom table, with his pertinent Whitehouse staff sitting around the table. “Mr. President, we really must get into the budget for the proposed wall on the Mexican border.” said Donny’s Chief of staff. “I told you all before, I said mall, not wall. It is not my fault that my double can’t read. A mall would of brought commerce from both sides, as well being a major tourist attraction, and girl magnet. We all know how much money women are responsible for spending while shopping. We could make fortune and staff it up with all Mexican labour and under pay them legally. That way they would have no reason to illegally cross the border. They can all work at the border.” said Donny fidgeting with his pen, drawing breasts on his note pad. “But that is not even feasible financially. We can barely afford to build the wall, let alone a mall that would stretch across the vast area of the Mexican/US border? Are you serious? You said wall not mall.” said the Vice President. “Hey Mikey, step back to your place bozo. I am in control.  You think I would want to build a fascist wall? What, are we Communists now? Is Fidel at this meeting? Come on people. If you were on my TV program “The Apprentice” you would be all fired. Now, lets get to work on the mall. not wall! And that is an executive order!” said Donny storming out of the boardroom as his entire staff sat there in confusion.

A bit later in the Whitehouse master bedroom, Mel was dressing and applying makeup. Donny was laying on the bed all wired up after taking a hit, something he was trying to hide from Mel. “Come on Donny, sober up. I really do not want to have to go to another theater with your stupid double. Can you get ready to go at least? said Mel applying some eyeliner at her vanity. “Why can’t we go to see a concert? Bruce Springsteen is in town. Lets go have some fun and party!” said Donny flicking through the channels on the TV with the remote. “Grow up Donny. We are both above all that right now. You are the President and I am the First Lady. We cannot go to a rock concert. Are you kidding? We could see a classical concert. There is one playing. Want to go?” asked Mel in a snobbish tone. “Not really. Hey, why not we fool around tonight, right here and order a pizza? We can get hot and heavy baby!” said Donny looking with hope and enthusiasm while coveting Mel’s impeccable female silhouette. “Not tonight dear, I have my period.” said Mel in an untruthful tone. “I will be right back honey. I am going for some smokes.” said Donny jumping off the bed and quickly leaving the room, closing the door. “Don’t you dare Donny you jerk! Not again!” said Mel in a Slavic accent she was camouflaging but sneaks out every once in a while when she gets mad. Not getting a response, she dialed her cell phone. “Yes, please get Donny’s double on alert. He may have to escort me to the theater tonight. Yes, thank you.” said Mel speaking into her cell phone, admiring her face in the vanity.

Knowing the secret tunnels well under the Whitehouse, Donny had no problem coming and going without being noticed. He got to a nearby street and flagged a Taxi down. “Take me to your nearest bar.” said Donny dialing his cell phone. “Hey Just! you wanna pick me up in your private Jet? Can you get away from ball and chain?  Lets party dude. I will wait for you at the international airport. Cool dude. And bring some tight ass Canadian girls with you! Alright! See you soon!” said Donny as his mood picked up now having someone to party with. “Drive to the airport instead Haboob!” said Donny lighting a smoke. “Yes sir, you give big tip, yes” said Haboob. “Of course! who do you think I am, George Jr? said Donny chuckling. “No sir, but he was very cheap, yes, very cheap.” said Haboob changing his route to go to the airport.

To be continued. Or censored. Which ever comes first.

“Tex” oNid ittEnEbEd (sHow nO mErcY)

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